


Warmonger

by Evensings



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Getting Back Together, M/M, Pining, Post-High School
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-31
Updated: 2020-10-31
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:54:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,235
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27308038
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Evensings/pseuds/Evensings
Summary: These are not the polite words spoken with condescension that he remembers. They aren't twisted in familiar passive aggressiveness either. Shirabu is actually being polite.Semi hates it.
Relationships: Semi Eita/Shirabu Kenjirou
Comments: 4
Kudos: 96





	Warmonger

**Author's Note:**

> Semi might be too much of a pining mess here? Oh well, it's my first try at these two. 
> 
> Hope some of you enjoy it anyway!

It's been a year since the last time they saw each other, three since they'd last spoken. Semi thinks he might have preferred being ignored, like Shirabu had done a year ago when the old team had gathered to watch the prefectural finals, Goshiki playing his last game in their old jerseys. Their whole relationship had been built from conflict, it had existed on conflict, had ended in conflict. Semi didn't know how to deal with pleasantries and _small talk_ , not when it was coming from Shirabu.

"How've you been Semi?" Shirabu had asked when they ran into each other in the coffee shop. Shirabu had never addressed him like this before. He'd passive aggressively been 'Semi-san' until they had gotten together. He had been Eita then, before he turned into a ghost in Shirabu's eyes. It sounded strange coming from Shirabu's mouth, it wasn't right. 

"Good," Semi answered, because that's just what you say when someone asks how you've been. "Took a government job, the band plays some bars on the weekends here and there." 

"You still play?" Shirabu asks conversationally. Shirabu was always great at keeping himself composed, but this looks effortless, not like his old masks of indifference. Do I not get under your skin anymore? Do you feel anything? Semi wants to comment on the handful of sugar packets Shirabu grabs to put in his coffee just to see if he'll scowl at him and snark back. At this point, he doubts he would. 

"Yeah, didn't want to give it up all together."

"I'm glad." Shirabu smiles at him. A normal smile you'd give any passing acquaintance. Where are his sarcastic grins? Where's the better-than-you sneer? Where's the coy smirk? It's like he doesn't know the man in front of him and it's killing him. 

So, maybe Semi never really got over Shirabu Kenjirou. The infuriating younger setter had wormed his way into his heart back in highschool and never left, even when Semi did. Semi had never wanted to break up, but they had explosive fights the months leading up to Semi's graduation. It seemed like one minute Shirabu was okay with long distance and the next he was shouting it would never work. In the end, Shirabu ended it. 

Semi knows now he wasn't innocent in their break up either. Looking back he can see where Shirabu's insecurities got the better of him, where Semi failed to reassure him. He can see where he started and escalated fights due to his own inner turmoil. Semi was going to be halfway across the country, starting at a university he'd drop out of a year and a half later and Shirabu was going to be left behind, taking over as Captain of the Shiratorizawa volleyball team. They were too young, too stubborn, too prideful to make it work. 

"And you?" Semi inquires. 

"Med school, up at the university. Just finished second year." He always knew Shirabu would get into medical school. He just thought he'd go to Tokyo. 

"You came here?"

"Osaka has a good medical research program." That's not it. Not all of it anyway. Semi gives Shirabu a look that says he knows that. Shirabu rolls his eyes before he continues. It's the first sign that Shirabu might still be Shirabu after all. "It's also far enough away that my parents don't expect me to come home on breaks." 

There it is. Shirabu played the part of the perfect son, but had an older brother he never seemed to outshine in his parents eyes. His focus on volleyball during school irritated them, even when his grades stayed well above anything Semi could have done himself. Semi remembers Shirabu coming to his dorm room after phone calls from his mother, angry and looking for a distraction. Sometimes they fought, threw hurtful words they didn't really mean back and forth until Shirabu was too irritated with him to think about his family. Sometimes though, they got up to other activities. Semi tries not to think about those nights right now. 

"Ah, so that hasn't changed." Like so much else had. 

"No, but taking summer classes helps. Keeps me here and helps spread out the class load." Of course Shirabu would be taking summer courses. It was just so, him. 

This has got to be the most civil conversation the two of them have ever had. Formal, polite. Even when they first met Shirabu had been a little brat, it didn't change when they started dating either. He wants him back. He wants to argue about what they're going to have for breakfast, he wants one of them making snarky comments the whole time because they didn't get their way, he wants hot, _hot_ sex after to make up for it. Maybe that's dysfunctional, maybe wanting that is why none of Semi's relationships had worked out. 

After everything, after all this time, Semi hadn't realized how much he had missed the fights. Not the huge fights leading up to the end, but the little day to day ones that always kept him on his toes. He misses Shirabu's little ticks. Misses knowing that he's under his skin, knowing he's living in Shirabu's head. He misses the snark, the sass, the salt. He wants to see it from Shirabu now, to know he still makes Shirabu feel something. 

But Shirabu gives nothing away. 

"Well, Semi, it's been nice running into you, but I have to head home." Shirabu takes his coffee and leaves before Semi can get another word in.

It takes Semi a few moments to process what just happened before he's rushing out the door too. He spots the familiar head of copper hair on the sidewalk up ahead and makes his way through the crowd on the sidewalk to catch up with him. Semi thinks he might be a little crazy, it's too cliche to be chasing his ex down the street. 

The only reason Semi catches up is because Shirabu had stopped. He's turned off the busy main road to a secluded side street with a few apartment complexes. Is this where Shirabu lived? Had he been this close this whole time? He sees Shirabu's shoulders move excessively up and down, like he's taking deep breaths. 

"Shirabu, Hey," Semi reaches out to touch his shoulder. His hand is quickly shoved away, Shirabu barely turns to face him before turning away again and walking forward. 

"I have things to do Semi." Shirabu dismisses him, but Semi follows. 

"Just - wait a minute."

"No." 

"Wait. Just listen you little -" It's too familiar. _You little brat, so uncute_ he used to say. He had never meant it, Shirabu was somehow at his most adorable while being a little shit. Not for the first time, Semi questions his taste in men. 

"If you'll excuse me, _Semi-san."_ Shirabu says while trying to side step around him. Fuck, Shirabu's angry. He's angry. _Semi-san_. Semi shouldn't feel such relief hearing a tense, barked out sentence. He's not letting him leave yet. He grabs Shirabu again and turns him around. His face is red in anger, his eyes are red rimmed with tears. He's not unaffected as Semi had thought. 

"Kenjirou." 

"Don't." Shirabu snaps. Semi feels his blood boil. He's not letting Shirabu dismiss him. He feels hot. Rage building slowly in his veins, swirling in his gut. Shirabu keeps walking, Semi keeps following. He feels something, it's written all over his face, why won't he admit it?

"You owe me this." Semi's voice matches Shirabu's now, hard and tense. 

"I don't owe you shit." There's his Shirabu. 

"You broke up with me." Semi accuses. 

"You _left_ me." There's something raw there, behind those spat out words. "And for what?" Shirabu snorts out a fake laugh. "You couldn't even commit to that for much longer than a year." They've made it inside one of the apartment buildings and up a set of stairs, Shirabu digging out a set of keys from his pocket to open a door. 

"Shut up. You don't get to judge my decisions. You weren't fucking there." University wasn't for him, but people always look down on him for dropping out and going straight into the workforce instead of wasting his time and money on what would have ended up a crummy major with no job opportunities. Leave it to Shirabu to find the freshest scab to pick at. 

"You made sure of that." Shirabu steps inside the apartment, fully intent on closing the door behind him and leaving Semi with those final words. But Semi isn't finished. He follows, too close behind to cut off, and slams the door shut behind him. 

"YOU BROKE UP WITH ME!" Semi is seething. Not many people have seen this side of Semi, but Shirabu has always managed to drive him crazy. He's forgotten what it's like, to _feel_ this much all at once. 

"I did." Shirabu stares him down, voice flat. "Get out of my house. " 

"No."

"Get out." 

"I'm not leaving." Semi stands his ground. 

"Why not? You've done it before." Shirabu scoffs. 

"That's why! Because I left before! Because you pushed me away!" Semi has a hard time keeping himself from yelling again. 

"So it's all my fault."

"That's-"

"You couldn't just fucking leave it alone. You had to follow me home, barge into my apartment, to what? Yell at me over how I fucked everything up?" Shirabu is panting now, angry, short, shallow breaths. 

"Kenjirou I -" 

"If that's the case you can save it. I already know." Shirabu isn't letting him get a word in edgewise now. "I can't fucking believe you. Or maybe I can. It's exactly like you to come around rubbing my fuck ups in my -"

Semi grabs him and pushes him up against the door. Semi would swear it was just to shut him up, but Shirabu is so close, his mouth still half open, face still red with anger and eyes wet with tears he won't let himself shed. They're both breathing hard, silent now, staring at each other. Semi was so mad a second ago about being interrupted, but now he couldn't tell you what he was going to say. 

He's not sure who leans in first, but when their lips meet its _war._ It's raw, they're spilling out everything into each other in a hot rage. It's a battle. Everything between them was always a battle. God, he missed this. He bites at Shirabu's lower lip, hard. He's surprised that he doesn't taste blood. Shirabu doesn't back down. 

They are open mouthed, tongues battling out physically instead verbally. Semi lowers his hands from where they had Shirabu's shoulders shoved against the door and holds him there by his hips instead. His hand traces the waistband of Shirabu's jeans. He's waiting, he knows Shirabu will give, he always had. _Please, I know you feel it too._ Semi pleads in his head, pleads with kisses and bites down Shirabu's neck, pleads with small circles he rubs into Shirabu's skin with his thumbs. 

It takes a few minutes, a few hot, desperate minutes, but then Semi feels it. Shirabu relaxes, all at once, into him. This man is putty in his hands. This beautiful, broken man is Semi's. He has always been, who had they been kidding? Shirabu's head rests on Semi's shoulder, and he lets out a choked sob. 

"Fuck you Eita." 

"Kenjirou," Semi turns his head to whisper the name into his ear. "I miss you."

"You don't." Shirabu says, softer than he's spoken since they met. "You don't. You can't. Not after everything." 

Semi hadn't realized how much Shirabu blamed himself for their relationship crumbling.

"I've _missed_ you." Semi will say it as many times as Shirabu needs to hear. "I've missed this. All of it. I miss us."

"I was awful then. I shouldn't have - I didn't mean -" Shirabu had always been his most honest after the fight collapsed, after he'd exhausted all his other emotions. He's glad that that hadn't changed, it makes him feel like he does still truly know the man in front of him. 

"I know. Seeing you today. You acted so nonchalant, you were _nice."_ Semi breathes out a soft laugh. "All I wanted was the real you."

"It's been three years Semi-san. That could be the real me." Shirabu's playful banter is music to his ears. 

"That's a bold faced lie and you know it." Semi pulls back so he's looking Shirabu in the eye and gives him a smirk. The emotional rollercoaster this has turned into is giving him whiplash and he loves it. He feels alive.

"Eita." Shirabu gets serious again. "I want… I want you to stay." Shirabu finally spits out the words Semi had waited three years to hear. "I wanted you to stay." 

If Semi thought he had missed Shirabu's scathing wit, he has no words for how much he longed for this. This vulnerable side Shirabu wouldn't dare show the world. 

"I'll stay." I would have stayed then too, if you had asked. Semi thinks it but doesn't say it. It'd probably be too painful. "Let me stay now."

Their gazes are glued together. There's so much they haven't said yet, so much they need to say, but right now their eyes just plead with each other. They'll figure out the rest later.

"Please, stay." For now, this is enough. This is a win. 


End file.
